I am now 27 and I know this will be a good year. I had a great birthday. It was my golden birthday, I turned 27 on May 27th. Jack took me out to a nice place for dinner, and we spent the next few hours talking in a beautiful park. The time sure slips away when we are together. I am so thankful for the friendship I have with him. I have learned so much from him, and God has used him to speak truth into my life. He knows me inside out, better than anyone but God. Sometimes, better than I know myself. This was a birthday dinner, and a goodbye. He will be leaving for Massachusetts for the summer in a few days, and I will be going to Kenya in two weeks. God is sending us out. Different places for different missions. I prayed for this, I remind myself. I asked God to change my reality. He sure has.
It doesn't seem logical, but surrender seems to breed hope. In that moment when we lose it all, that is the moment we gain what we really need. And hope... What does it really have to offer? I want to learn more. I want to know more about God and life and what truly is important. Teach me, Lord.
I know what I want. Not for life, but for now. My dreams have changed, as has my reality. Or maybe it was my reality that changed my dreams. Ether way, I am not who I used to be. It is good.
I leave for Kenya, two weeks from tomorrow. I'm really unsure of what I'm going to do after that, but I know God will let me know in his time. For now, I want to enjoy where I am and become all I can in this season of life. And my days are very full. I am living and being used like crazy. In the mean time, I want to know myself really well. I want to know what I really want and am made for. I get confused about God granting us the desires of our heart. I wonder if I missed that one, especially when I hear of a childhood friend and her husband who just had their third child, and another getting married soon. Sometimes I wonder if I have just not yet arrived. Maybe God has other things for me to do first. I want to do them. God is such a mystery to me. Even more so as I learn more about him. But I believe even more.
Blessings!
Laura
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